More Sarcastic Quotes . . .

-- "The people you care most about in life are taken from u 2 soon & all the less important ones never go away."

-- "I can either be your best friend or your worst enemy".

-- We crush the caterpillars then complain there are no butterflies

-- "Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic."

-- I'm not a tease, Im just a reminder of what you can't have

-- If it doesn't fit force it, if it breaks it needed replaced anyway**

-- "I hold the key to world peace, but somebody changed the lock!"

-- The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you dont have to mow it

-- "A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it."

-- "An honest answer can get you into a lot of trouble."

-- "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized."

-- "Enjoy life. There's plenty of time to be dead."

-- "Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyways."

-- You know what they say: A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down but what if you're diabetic?."

-- "I don't want to achieve immortality thru my work. I want to achieve immortality thru not dying"

-- Money can't buy happiness; it can, however, rent it.

-- The fellow who thinks he knows it all is especially annoying to those of us who do

-- Ugliness is superior to beauty because it lasts.

-- None of us can boast about the morality of our ancestors. The records do not show that Adam and Eve were married.

-- I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks

-- A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light.

-- Either the wallpaper goes or I do